His name wasn't Scott

I met a man yesterday. "Scott." Its the english name he goes by. Scott is running. 

A couple of us were invited to come to an english tutoring center to give their students more access to fluent english speakers to practice the language. Three men came and sat at my table. A kurd and two arabs. They traveled in a pack, as if they were only comfortable with each other. Really it was just that two of them were huddling around Scott, the best english speaker of the three of them. Scott is from Baghdad. To me, Baghdad is a mysterious city clouded by violence and confusion. A place that needs hope and a people who need peace. To Scott, Baghdad was a cloud of dust in his rearview mirror. 

Scott wants to be American. He was wearing a tight fitting brown cotton shirt, dark green pants and a ball cap that may or may not have had a U.S. military unit number written on along the side of its bill. Scott translated for the military and has desperately clung to what he has experienced as "American," from the clothes to going to the gym. He might be the only "thick" Iraqi I've seen yet.

Scott wants out. He has seen the war that has devastated his country. He fled to Syria, of all places, during the Civil War. Scott has no hope for his country. He has seen a glimpse of the "freedom" of America through translating for the military and through the 7 times he's watched "Friends."

Here I am. An American, here in Iraq, with hopes and aspirations of helping Kurds and Arabs. Hoping to show each of them that they have value, with hopes that one day preemptive love will unmake the violence and hatred here in Iraq. I hope this while men like Scott, smart men, charismatic and leaders, just want out. He has seen violence and felt war. 

 I do not think less of him for leaving. I definitely do not blame him. But I pity Iraq because of him. Iraq will need the men who have seen the violence and blood spilt in hate. It will need them to stand. I think the hope of reconciliation in iraq rests with those who want to have no part in violence, who have seen war tear families apart and want it no more.

I hope all the Scotts don't leave.